A Letter to My Little Girl
80One month old
18 months old
2 years old
Almost 3
Haley and her 3rd (early) B-day present. A guinea pig named Pepper
Dear Haley,
This letter has taken me almost 3 years to finish. I started it when you were 2 months old. Before you were born, I began thinking of who you would be. Certainly you would be like me as a little girl; shy, pleasing, loved books and dancing. Possibly you would be like your dad; strong, quiet, trouble maker. My first lesson in parenthood, is children have their own unique personality. Every day I am reminded you are your own little person. You are a born leader, gentle, alert, infectious, sensitive, outgoing, observant. You like princesses and dragons equally and pretend sword fight in your fancy fairy dress.
When you learned to talk, I'll never forget one of our first conversations:
We took a stroll almost nightly after dinner since you were a baby. You eagerly pointed to the moon whenever you saw it. Moon was your first word. Just like every night, we saw the moon.
Haley: "Look! MOON!!" Pointing eagerly at the glowing sliver in the sky.
Mama: "Yes, Haley. There's the moon", with slightly forced enthusiasm since this was about the millionth time you've pointed this out.
But this time...was different.
Haley: Gaze fixated at the moon, and appearing to be as confident as a billionaire business man in a boardroom, you state, "I'll go get it mama!"
Mama:(heart melting and not one ounce of forced enthusiasm) "OK Haley. You go get the moon. I know you can!"
That's just you. I have to say since having you, I believe in the impossible just a little bit more.
When you were a little baby, the best compliment I ever got about you was from a lady walking behind us in the mall. I was carrying you over my shoulder, trying to burp you. This lady comes to tell me she had never seen a baby so young hold eye contact with her for so long. She said it was a wonderful trait for a baby to possess because she had worked with several children in her life as a retired child psychologist. To this day, Haley, you are still like this. You will ask me to look at you when I talk to you and sometimes you touch people gently on their arm or cheek to get us to look at you.
One hurdle we had to get over this last year was how well I could take care of you since getting Rheumatoid Arthritis. I had to explain to you my hands were "ouchy". Although many parts of my body hurt, my hands are always the worst. You began to get the concept and consistently started telling me you will be a doctor and help them. I just want to thank you for that.
Some lessons I'd love to impart on you:
- Contrary to what people think, wisdom does not have to come with age. Wisdom is being able to apply many types of knowledge to your life no matter how old you are. It's learning to be content when things are tough, and learning to be humble when things are great.
- Nobody is perfect, but we can all learn from each other. You may have friends who will make mistakes and go downhill with tough lessons. Instead of doing what they did, learn from them and you will save yourself from learning the hard way. If it can cost you your life, it's not a lesson worth learning.
- I believe everyone is given a special gift. You nurture your gift with your parent's love for you, experience, passion, and hard work. I would give you the world, but the most important things for you to have are those you get and learn for yourself.
- On being a teen someday. Sometimes I feel like you already are and you're barely out of diapers. You have a strong sense of who you are, right and wrong, and not settling- strange for someone your age. When you are young, you have to use heart and intuition because your brain isn't completely developed. Once you can utilize logic more, don't lose that intuition, heart, and gut feelings. "Ethics and atmosphere are inseparable. So where are you hanging out?" random quote I remember. Be careful of who and where you chose to be. It is worth having only a couple of really good friends versus having 30 not-so-good ones.
- Don't try to save the world. Save yourself and be an inspiration. Set your own examples and be your best self.
- You can do anything you want, it just depends on the effort you put into it. I believe this more than any other truth.
I've always wanted to be a writer since I was a kid. I wrote the best short stories about fairies and animals going to heaven, but stopped when my parents got divorced. All of a sudden life was too serious for make-believe. Even though I always wanted to be a writer, I never thought I'd have a child. Ironically, now that I've had you, you give me the inspiration to write again after so many years. Now I have both my loves.
Right now you come to me and say " My belly hurts. Will you rub it?" I think of the pain in my hands and suddenly it's irrelevant. I say "Come here honey." Then I rub your belly until you go to sleep. And recite my poem to you:
I'd give you the moon at night,
or maybe just a kiss good night.
I'd give you the stars above,
will you settle for all my love?
I'd give you a sun so bright,
but I can warm you, hold you tight.
I'd give you the whole world too,
or simply say "I'll always love you".
To my darling Haley. Happy 3rd Birthday September 10.
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your joints may be so aching
thy emotions you arent faking
your wonderful daughter in the making
sure-will never ever be forsaking
What a precious child! What a remarkably loving mother! What an engrossing and insightful hub! What an excellent story-teller you are! I look forward to more.
Oh a lovely letter for a beautiful little girl!!
So sweet. I am a mother to a wonderful grown daughter and this brought back some memories. This is a great idea, I've written letters to my daughter to tell her how much I appreciate her and love her. IT's so important.
David Stone~ What a beautiful way to start the comments. Thank you so much - that means a lot to me.
tinyteddy~ I love it!
drbj~ Thank you for the wonderful compliments.
Triplet mom~ When I first met you on here, my daughter was about a year old and I remember reading many of your hubs, which kept me going on here becuse if you could write with triplets I certainly could with one child. lol. thanks for the comment.
char m~ I know my daughter will be just as special to me when she is grown too. I certainly appreciate my time with her now.
This is so beautiful! Your daughter will always have these memories of yours throughout her life. I would have loved it if my parents had written such memories down for me. I may have to do this for my children even though they are already grown to adulthood. I may have to write memories down for my two grand children also. Thank you for sharing your wonderful treasure (child) with us.
Dardia~ you have no idea how special it is to have letters or written memories for those in your family. My mom still writes something for me from time to time throughout the years. She was the one who encouraged me to write things for my daughter and about her so I started. I'm sure you have great memories being created with with your grandchildren right now. It wasn't until I was in my 20's that I appreciated stuff my mom had written, but I certainly do now. THanks so much for your comment.
What a wonderful Hub for your daughter! Your words are inspirational, one can only hope that everyone could view their child as you do.
Voted up awesome and beautiful!
No one understands the depth of love a parent has for their children, unless you are one. I believe that the love and bond of a mother is made deeper by the 9 months she has this tiny gift from God growing inside of her. Izettl, what a truly beautiful letter this is to hand down to your little girl. I'm sure that in time she will come to treasure your letters and no doubt carry on to write to her own children. Beautiful hub.
Hugs
Izett, this letter out of your motherly heart is so beautiful, and Haley is so-so beautiful. You’ve softened my heart to marshmallow with this. Keep on enjoying every moment with her, before you know it, she will be an adult. I’m trying (without success) to picture your husband. Quiet, but a trouble maker? My perception of quiet guys is that they avoid trouble. You’ve got to explain this, for I am now too curious :)))
sweetsusieg~ Thanks for the votes up! I can't see motherly love being anything but intuition. Believe it or not, I didn't think I would have kids because I was an only child and I knew nothing about babies, never held one until I held my daughter after she was born. It all came naturally from then on.
Loves to read~ I think you are right about the special bond. I think she will someday appreciate the time I took and words I wrote expecially for her. It is so hard explaining a mother's love but you did a great job! thanks for your comment.
Martie~ Hi there. It softens my heart to read it too. I had most of written long time ago and just came across it the other day and re-reading it brought a couple tears to my eyes. Geesh, I'm sappy! Yes, my husband was a major trouble maker when he was a kid. Not so much anymore, he is an ex-marine so that straightened him out and an injury while he was in took him down a notch too. He is quiet, in conversations, I often have to get the ball rolling. Picture the strong silent type. That's been one of our hurdles because I love to ponder thoughts and talk to people about their experiences. He is funny though and playful. Ironically, in class when we met, he was the most talkative person in there. Something changed after we were married and we have to work on that. I think he has begun to take life too serious and that has come with a series of events this past couple of years. Our child, his career, my illness, etc.
Very heartwarming,beautiful. I am preparing to become a mother in the future. Thank you for that beautiful ode.
I love your writing, it is heartfelt and oh so moving. You are extremely talented. Thumbs up for a beautiful hub.
bashiekie~ congratulations on becoming a mom soon. And thank you for that nice comment.
breakfastpop~ great to see you. I enjoyed writing this and thank you so much for the compliments.
"Save yourself and be an inspiration"...this is a great quote. Plenty of great wisdom in this hub, and I am very impressed overall. You sound like a great Mom, and your kid is great too. This is a lovely heart-warming hub, and an original idea. Let's hope this hub stays here by the tine she is able to read it and understand it all. Cheers! :D
cheeky girl~ Yeah it would be really cool if this was flaoting around hubpages a few years down the road so she could see it. I was probably the most unlikely person to be a mom, knowing nothing about babies, but it's just inexplainable how nurturing and loving her came so naturally. Thanks so much for the ocmment.
This is very sweet - it's amazing how our children inspire us. I too began writing again after having my daughter. Children are blessings in more ways imaginable! Thanks for sharing this very sweet and beautifully written letter to your darling daughter.
Cari Jean~ thanks for the wonderful and thoughtful comment. I couldn't agree more that children are true blessings.
Laura,
The only thing more beautiful than this letter to your daughter is your daughter herself. Never saw dad, but I'm assuming she get's her looks from her great looking mom. (laughing) Nice work kid. Thumbs up, beautiful, and awesome!
jim
Thanks tmwnp~ I don't see her as either one of us- personality or looks, but I suppose she's a combo. I was a shy kid and dad was a troublemaker- she's neither of those for sure. She has blonde hair and blue eyes like dad. I wasn't expecting that I thought my dark hair and eyes would be dominant so it's cool. The curly hair is something else- don't really know where she got that from, but it makes her unique as well as get a lot of compliments. She is tall like me- off the charts on height for her age. I love that I hope she stays tall.
She had such a great birthday party yesterday. It's fun because she is into girly stuff that I wasn't into when I was little. When I was pregnant and found out I'd be having a girl, I panicked because I was a tom boy, but so far I'm able to embrace tea parties, baby dolls, and princesses.
Thank you for sharing your wonderful child with us.
THanks loisxfourie. Great to see you.
Beautifully done. And you love for your daughter shines through.
666divine~ thanks for the comment. There is no doubt of my love for her.
Had to fight the tears as I read through the most beautiful hub ever! Haley, beautiful, wise with a Mother that is an angel to lead and guide her. I will pray and meditiate daily for the complete release of your physical pain. You have so much love. I am indeed deeply blessed to have found you here on HP. All of my love and prayers to you and your beautiful Haley.
vocalcoach~ thanks for the thoughtful comment. Amazingly simple letter to my daughter but absolutely full of my heart. I am glad you got to read it.
Sweet Sweeter Sweetest Emotional expression....it kept me travelling along with the moments you carved in your writing....only a mother can touch these horizons
"...Gaze fixated at the moon, and appearing to be as confident as a billionaire business man in a boardroom, you state, "I'll go get it mama!"
seimental~ that phrase you chose there is exactly why kids inspire people. Their little minds have no limits.
Thanks for the nice comment.
What a beautiful letter to a beautiful little girl.
This was such a warm and heart tugging story.
An awesome/beautiful and up here
I now look forward to reading more of your work
Take care
Eiddwen
Thank you Eiddwen
Hi izetti - your writing really is truly amazing. So many of your comments ring true with me. I am an only child and never really wanted children because I didn't know what to do and was very scared about the physical side. My little girl is nearly 2 years old and is so gorgeous. I wrote her a letter last year when I was very depressed because I thought I had Rheumatoid Arthritis like my mother (she is a piano teacher and has pain in her hands) but yet still enjoying motherhood - the emotions are overwhelming. My husband thinks he does a lot of helping out but I have to ask and he makes me feel guilty and then seems to almost commend himself for being so capable. He does so little that I pretty much look after baby R seven days a week - I gave up my very busy, well paid job. I did this out of choice because I wanted to be with baby R all the time but that doesn't mean that it isn't exhausting and hard work. Tonight my husband was in a foul mood and ended up shouting at me that he is doing everything for this family! This is after a week of baby R eating virtually nothing and crying and wanting to be carried all the time and me ending up calling the health visitor for advice because I am so worried. My husband's world seems to revolve round him - his job, his money, going to the gym, going swimming.
I think that part of setting an example to baby R should be me looking after myself more - I have had my hair cut once in 2 years! I'm sure girls would benefit more if they could see their mothers taking better care of themselves - I don't mean mothers putting themselves first all the time - just a bit more often. Especially after childbirth and carrying baby so much - I am an older mum (nearly 43 when I had baby R) and have seen my younger friends all recover physically much more easily than I have. I wish my husband would appreciate this.
Anyway, I love your writing - your style is fabulous and your wording just beautiful. I am looking forward to reading a lot more - and I hope you print out / publish all of your hub comments for your daughter and make them into a book for her. It would be a treasure.
Thanks so much G Up~ I always tell moms to take care of themselves because if you don't, you will have to. What I mean by that is I didn't take care of myself for the first 2 years of my daughter's life and now I have to because of my Rheumatoid Arthritis. My husband now has to make sure I'm taken care of. I don't like the situation sometimes but also it has made my life easier in a way so it's a catch 22. Boy does your story ring true for me. My husband liked getting frustrated and instead of driving him to the point he would shout, he'd seclude himself to the office to work on "stuff" or take a nap or anything to excuse himself from our life.
The cycle is awful that you're in. The man wants more attention and doesn't want his life to change after a baby, but by him not helping out, he is making it even worse for himself. I started shocking my husband by being ready to go somewhere as soon as he got home from work and stated, I'll be back in one hour. I just had to TAKE (demand and expect)my time to get away.
Best of luck to you and my daughte now 3 1/2 is getting so much easier. Life with her now is much different than 2 so things will get better for you.
A good friend of mine who has two daughters told me one day that when I gave birth to my daughter, I just gave birth to own best friend. My daughter is now 17 and I see this happening. I still must play the role of mother; thus, she resents that at times yet I know she appreciates the boundaries I create for her even if she can't yet acknowledge that at this point in her life. Soon though she will go off to college and I must let go more and more and trust in the foundation that has been set for her. Your daughter will one day read this hub and really appreciate this gift.
trimar7~ that's good to hear your experience because I hope to maintain a good relationship with my daughter, yet I know the ups and downs ahead of us. Thanks for the comment and Happy Mother's Day!
I've been meaning to tell you for a while that you have to listen to the song In My Arms by Plumb. It's a mother's song to her baby. Every time I hear that song, I think of you and your love for your kids.
Congrats on the new baby! Hope you're staying healthy and sane!
Thanks Elefanza! I'll check the song out and thanks for thinking of me.
David Stone Level 1 Commenter 20 months ago
Some of the finest poetic writing I've ever read–and I've read a lot. My first wish, after reading this and hoping you overcome your physical limitations, is that you write more and expansively. Your generous mind needs a book to fully capture the intricacies you think about. You've got two great blessings. Here's hoping you are granted even more.